we're foster parents

** written June 27th, 2014 **

Last February James and I began the process of becoming licensed foster parents. It's something we'd talked about since before we were married, I worked with a foster/adopt ministry for just over 4yrs, and it actually wasn't the first stroll we'd taken down the path of getting licensed [but that's another story for another day].

After a lot of classes, paperwork, appointments, childproofing, and otherwise prepping our hearts and home, we did our home study. After doing our home study there were a few more things to fill out and a few more changes to make to our home.... then we waited.

Today we got the call from our agency, Covenant Kids, and we were told that we are officially foster parents now in the state of Texas. It's been months of work, and classes, and babysitters, and nerves, and prayers, and it all culminated in one really uneventful moment on the phone. I at least felt like there should have been a balloon drop, or some confetti.

I was immediately relieved [you're basically waiting to get a pass/fail on your life as parents, so it's a little unsettling], and filled with hope and joy. Something we've prayed about, worked hard to accomplish, and felt called to do was finally happening!

Then it hit me. I'm a horrible person. I mean, I'm over here partying in my heart because I was just told that I'm a foster parent... but the only reason anyone is ever a foster parent is because of tragedy. This isn't the Dickensian era of orphans anymore. This isn't that both parents contracted some form of influenza and died, and there are no living relatives, and the kids just need parents now, but they've otherwise been well loved and cared for until then.

In all likelihood, these kids technically have parents. Their parents are statistically likely to be enslaved by some illegal or abused substance, have a criminal record, and possibly even have been in foster or kinship care at some point in their own childhoods. These are orphans, but their parents are quite alive, and usually quite aware of their existence.

We live in a time of horribly broken families, and the parents of these children are broken as well. They are hurting, trapped, undervalued, addicted, depressed, unnoticed, marginalized... without help. Children shouldn't suffer the consequences of their parents' poor choices, so the State intervenes and places them in safe homes, with stable families, until a safe place is found or created for them with their biological families, or until those options have been exhausted and they are placed for adoption.

We shouldn't HAVE to do this. We shouldn't BE foster parents. Those children should never be put in those positions to begin with. Those parents should never be in those positions. People should all be loved and valued, cherished and cared for, encouraged, helped and uplifted, supported and understood, nurtured and guarded, protected and guided.

All people.

Everywhere.

Every. Single. Human.



Today, I'm excited to officially be called a foster parent, but devastated by the very necessity of the role.  The dichotomy of emotions isn't something I think I can really convey.

I can't imagine how my heart will both break and soar when we welcome a child into our home. Today we begin to pray for that child, whoever he or she might be. Pray with us?